I am just in a vile mood today and it is getting worse. It’s nobody’s fault, no one has done anything bad to me. Everyone has been very solicitous and considerate.
I picked up my mother’s ashes today in a plain cardboard box. She always told me she didn’t want a funeral. She wanted to be cremated and told me to throw the ashes in the garbage. She made a great show of being practical and unsentimental. I think she looked upon that sort of consideration as weakness.
I don’t know what I’ll do with the ashes. Maybe scatter them on the roses. Maybe add them to the compost. Or perhaps bury them in the backyard next to the cats. She definitely did not want to be interred in our hometown.
We have a date and time for the memorial service, so I can proceed forward with putting death notices in the local paper. Remembrances can be made to The American Cancer Society.